The Robe Can Wait

Remember when India Arie sang “sometimes I shave my legs, and sometimes I don’t/sometimes I comb my hair, and sometimes I won’t“? I HAVE NEVER FELT MORE SEEN.

I’m currently lying on the bed trying to decide if I should do my hair. I mean… I assume so, but I don’t feel like it so I’m looking for any feedback that says it’s not necessary. Tell me what I want to hear, guys. Agree with me.  Please.

I don’t know how it happened but I agreed to go out tonight. On a Tuesday. For a while I thought about how I could get out of it, but then I remembered that I just bought a(nother) pair of snakeskin boots, and this could be a good opportunity to wear them. Are we all aware of my chronic condition that doesn’t allow me to walk away from snakeskin in a store? I can’t do it. I am physically unable.

Anyway I’m gonna wear my boots and my boots dictate that I wear a smoky eye and a smoky eye mandates some big hair.

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I don’t make the rules.

Not gonna lie, though. When I went to search for that Beyonce gif, I typed in “Beyonce Hair” and every single one that popped up made me want to do my hair. I should’ve done that hours ago.

One of my best friends got a promotion, and we’re going out to celebrate with her. We’ve all gotta wake up early in the morning, so I don’t foresee us being out all night. But if we are, I guess that’s okay. Celebrating a friend is more important than (one night’s) sleep!

Kept On Ice

After seven years of hoping and plotting and wishing and scheming, I finally made it to the Icehotel in northern Sweden. A hotel consisting of mostly ice.

You didn’t hear me.

A HOTEL OF MOSTLY ICE!

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Our room.

They have cold rooms and warm rooms, but what’s the point of going if you’re not gonna spend at least one night in a cold room? We spent one night in a cold room and one night in a warm room. In the cold room, you’re basically sleeping on a slab of ice. A SLAB OF ICE! I don’t know why that was enticing to me…but it was! And you can’t deny that this hotel is sexy as f*ck. I mean, look at this bed/block of ice! I could do a music video here…if I were a musician. Oooh, Beyonce should do a music video here! Can you imagine?!

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The hotel provides you with an extreme weather sleeping bag, which doesn’t seem like enough, but it was definitely warm and toasty. And obviously, you sleep in your thermals and stuff–don’t be stripping down in the cold rooms, y’all. It ain’t that sexy. Wait ’til you get to the warm room for all that.

The temps inside the hotel are around 22 degrees. It’s cold, but you’re so taken with the novelty of the experience that it just doesn’t seem that uncomfortable. Also, the hotel provides you with your necessary outer layers (kinda like a snow suit). I brought some wool blend thermals and socks, and I was never too cold.

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The hotel bar

They serve you drinks in glasses made of only ice, too. And when you’re done drinking, you’re supposed to go outside and throw them at the side of the hotel. Can confirm that it’s good fun.

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You can’t get into your rooms until six pm, because the ice rooms and art rooms are open to the public for tours until then. And you have to leave your room early in the morning, too, because of the tours. Also, there are shared bathrooms (when you’re staying in the cold rooms), which I didn’t think I’d willingly subject myself to anymore after my study abroad days, but it was worth it for this experience!

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The chapel. People get married here!
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Don’t walk on these stairs! They’re just an art installment.
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yeah, it was pretty chilly outside

During the days, we went dog sledding and snowmobile-ing. There were only about four hours of daylight each day. We were also able to see the northern lights (aurora borealis) on our last night, and they were majestic. I’ve always had an obsession with the night sky, and these lights were breathtaking in person. Perhaps me compulsively taking any and all astronomy classes in college was leading me to that very moment!

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Oh, and by the way, if you’re thinking of flying to the arctic circle, it’s a lot cheaper to go in February–probably because it’s cold as hell–but it’s one hundred percent worth the extra layers!

Okay, I’ve gotta go figure out how to insert myself back into real life now.

À la prochaine !

The City That Never Sleeps & Pilates

This past weekend we went to New York on a whim. I love New York, but it’s not a city for introverts like me long-term. A short trip is perfect, though, and I love dressing up in glam clothes and pretending like I’m a native New Yorker. It’s one of the few times my (faux) fur jacket and (faux) leather pants make it out of my closet. You can be anyone you want in New York! I choose to channel Tracee Ellis Ross. And Rihanna.

The city was even crazier because of Fashion Week, but I don’t know–maybe it’s always like that. I’ve certainly never seen it calm! Part of its appeal, I guess. Mostly all we did was walk around, eat, take pictures, eat, and walk around. I finally got to dine at Balthazar, which is a French restaurant that’s been on my list for a while. It was magnifique and worth its spot. New York is filled with French restaurants, and I have about twenty-three on my bucket list. That’s gonna take more than a weekend, though!

Back at home, I went to Pilates this evening. It was fun, but I don’t understand why Pilates classes have to be so extortionate. Like gimme a break–a girl’s just trying to lift her ass and cinch her waist.  I bought the most beautiful yoga mat a few weeks ago.

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Look at that red! I live. This mat was the subject of much controversy among my group of friends. A couple of them thought the price was ridiculous for a yoga mat and so I shouldn’t get it, and a couple of them thought the price was just right for something so stunning. Guess which friends I listened to.

Yep.

You guessed it!

Alright, it’s late and I still have to watch an episode of Barbie in French. I read this article a while ago that said things you learn right before you fall asleep, you are more likely to remember. I need all the help I can get.

À plus !

Saint Valentine

You know how whenever Valentine’s Day rolls around there are always people who are like “Valentine’s Day is stupid because you should be showing love every single day and it’s just a commercial holiday and also kakjsbvdbvdsbfkdsfsbvbvbjdbvd!” Which always makes me go:

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and

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and

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Valentine’s Day is my shiiiitttt. I used to love picking out the best assorted Valentine’s Day cards to exchange with all my classmates and conversation hearts–don’t get me started on those because they are the greatest. And to this day, I make heart-shaped cookies for all of my friends, and when I bring them the cookies (and candy hearts) they’re like:

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It’s like casting pearls before swine with these jerks. They don’t deter me, though, because I know a good holiday when I see one. And this year my goddaughter is three so I have someone who (whom?) I can indoctrinate to take on my valid beliefs.

Next week we are going to make cookies and cupcakes for her classmates, and they are going to be the prettiest and most elegant (don’t three-year-olds care about elegance?) treats they’ve ever seen. I guess I should also mention that I’m oddly competitive about things that don’t matter at all. Anyway, I’m going to pick her up from school today so we can ransack Target for all the things we need to make this happen. We may have to go to Michael’s too. Buckhead traffic will not dissuade me or my mission!

We’re gonna try to make macarons, which is risky because I know those are even difficult for an experienced cook, but I found this recipe that claims to be foolproof. I’ll let you know if it isn’t!

Vive la Valentine’s Day!

Grown

I just texted my friend with a picture of my new rose gold chrome nails, and her verbatim response was, “Biiiittttcchhhh.” That means she likes them.

Tomorrow I’m going to a friend’s birthday dinner, so of course I’m conditioning my hair with an egg right now. I don’t remember where I heard about it, but last time I tried it, it made my hair extremely shiny. Try it. You’re welcome.

Earlier today I came home and decided to make fried chicken for dinner. On the fly. No prep. It was a whole disaster. I’ve been taking classes, but, er, um, I’m still not ready for the impromptu-no-recipe-no-preparation-dinners. It was depressing, so I went online and bought another silk robe. What does one have to do with the other? Thank you for asking! When I prance around the house in a silk robe, it makes me feel like I’m killing it at this being-an-adult thing. I mean, only adults do that, right? See? My logic is airtight.

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Alright, I’ve gotta go rinse my hair and get back to this Golden Girls marathon I’m watching on TV. When I was a kid, Dorothy was my favorite character, but now I’m kinda vibing with Blanche. However, I think both of them are too mean to Rose.

G’bye!

 

Aloha

My best friend’s birthday was Christmas day. Eight of us planned a trip to Maui to celebrate. I don’t necessarily care for tropical vacations (give me a snowy hill and a snowboard, please), but I love Hawaii. It’s so, so, so beautiful. Everywhere you look there’s just jaw-dropping scenery. I’ve been walking around with my mouth open for twenty-four hours. Hawaii really is paradise. That was extremely cliché. When I was a kid, I always thought I’d be a really cool adult who always said really cool things, but…nope.

Yesterday we went snorkeling. The water, the fish–everything was in technicolor. How are all the colors so bright here?! We also went whale watching. A whale jumped out of the water like ten feet in front of me. I thought my heart would explode out of my chest it was pounding so hard! To see a living thing so enormous that it looks like it could swallow you whole is pretty thrilling.

Guys, I’m not going to lie to you–I felt really close to nature yesterday. Like so close that I felt mad guilt for wanting to eat seafood. And then mad guilt for actually eating seafood. And now I feel mad guilt for telling you that I had the best scallops and ahi of my life last night. But I’m eating fruit this morning to hopefully mitigate some of this contrition I feel! There’s a line in a Fiona Apple song that I love that says, “Can’t take a good day without a bad one/don’t feel just to smile til I’ve had one…” and I never feel her more on that than when I’m doing things like sitting in paradise making myself feel guilty.

Today there are no scheduled plans except to find shaved ice and food trucks and maybe float on my back in this glorious salt water and watch the clouds pass by overhead with all of these jerks that I love so much. I guess I can withstand a little guilt for a day like that.

A hui hou!

Bonne Année!

I woke up this morning and most of my pillows were on the floor and the sheets were untucked. As per usual. Anyone else a savage sleeper? I mean, I sleep like a log. But obviously a thrashing, wiggling log. When I was about seven, the whole family was at my grandma’s house so we had to be resourceful with sleeping arrangements. I slept in my grandma’s bed with her, and the next morning she was like, “never again!” And she meant it. It’s comforting to know that some things just don’t change!

This morning I went to brunch with some of my family, and then we went to the mall for some light browsing. I looovee to browse. I’m not the best at making decisions about things right away. I like to ponder. It’s a strength and a weakness. I can tell you all the notes of that perfume you’re considering and five other perfumes that are similar. But if you want to go out and eat lunch with me right now…well, you’ll definitely have to decide where. I’m not a machine!

I’m a little sad that the holiday season is over (still really have the urge to keep watching Home Alone), and I’m always a little irked at the “new year new me” sentiment that January brings about. But that’s just me having a good ol’ love/hate relationship with change. It’s necessary and good and blah blah blah. But man, does it knock me off balance for a minute (longer than a minute)!

Happy New Year, guys! Enjoy your black-eyed peas!